Multilevel Kebaikan
Ada teman yang pernah bertanya, "apa sih yang membuat kamu
senang membantu orang lain?"
Saya berikan dia dua jawaban, pertama, karena Allah senang dengan
orang-orang yang suka membantu saudaranya. Allah akan memberikan
kemudahan bagi orang yang memudahkan orang lain. Kedua, saya berjanji
kepada seseorang untuk terus berbuat baik membantu orang lain.
"Seseorang ...?" teman saya makin bingung.
Baiklah, saya akan perjelas. Beberapa tahun lalu saya pernah berada
dalam kesulitan keuangan. Kuliah saya terancam berantakan karena saya
tak mampu mengumpulkan uang kuliah dari sisa-sisa gaji saya yang memang
kecil. Saya nyaris putus asa dan berpikir akan mengakhiri kuliah saya
dan berhenti di tingkat dua saja. Biarlah tinggal mimpi, pikir saya.
Disaat kebingungan dan putus asa melanda itulah, ada seorang sahabat
yang datang menanyakan kabar saya dan juga studi saya. Karena kami biasa
berterus terang tentang segala hal, saya katakan kondisi saya baik-baik
saja. Tapi kuliah saya yang terancam gagal. Mendengar pengakuan saya,
sahabat tersebut kemudian menawarkan bantuan sejumlah uang untuk
membayar uang kuliah saya yang tertunggak.
Tanpa basa-basi, saya langsung menerima tawaran tersebut tanpa berpikir
terlebih dulu bagaimana nanti menggantinya.
Di akhir semester empat, saya sempat bertanya kepadanya perihal bantuan
yang diberikan kepada saya. Ada yang membuat saya heran dengan
jawabannya, "Saya hanya berjanji kepada seseorang untuk senantiasa
berbuat baik membantu orang lain"
Kemudian ia memperjelas, Ia pernah mendapati ibunya yang sakit keras
dan harus segera dibawa ke rumah sakit. Namun tak sepeser pun uang yang
ia dan anggota keluarga lainnya miliki saat itu. demi kesembuhan ibunya,
ia nekat menghubungi satu persatu orang yang dikenalnya yang mungkin
bisa membantu biaya pengobatan. Hingga akhirnya, ada seorang sahabat
lamanya yang dengan cuma-cuma membiayai seluruh biaya yang dibutuhkan
untuk kesembuhan sang ibu.
Terheran sahabat itu bertanya, "Kenapa kamu mau membantu saya?"
Jawabnya, "Karena saya telah berjanji kepada seseorang untuk senantiasa
berbuat baik membantu orang lain"
Menurut cerita sahabat saya, sahabat lamanya itu pernah pula mendapati
kesulitan dalam hidupnya. Ia hampir tak tahu kemana lagi meminta bantuan
hingga ia bertemu dengan seseorang yang tak dikenal sebelumnya. Setelah
berterus terang, orang tak dikenal itu pun memberikan apa yang
dibutuhkan sahabat lama itu. kepada orang itu ia bertanya, "Anda
sebelumnya tidak mengenal saya, kenapa Anda mau membantu saya?"
Anda sudah bisa menduga jawabnya bukan? Tapi ada pertanyaan kedua dari
sahabat lama sahabat saya itu, "Bagaimana saya mengganti kebaikan Anda
ini?"
Orang tak dikenal itu menjawab, "Berjanjilah untuk melakukan banyak hal
untuk membantu kesulitan orang lain. Itu lebih baik nilainya daripada
mengganti apa yang telah saya berikan"
Begitulah seterusnya hingga saya tak pernah tahu siapa yang pertama kali
menyulam jaringan amal kebaikan ini. Sungguh, saya tak pernah tahu.
Hanya saja yang pasti akan saya lakukan setiap kali memberikan bantuan
kepada orang lain, saya akan berkata, "Berjanjilah untuk melakukan
kebaikan yang sama terhadap orang lain yang membutuhkan".
(Bayu Gautama)
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Monday, July 30, 2007
boy
What Bad Boys Do...
Women who allow themselves to fall victim to bad boys simply cannot accept that men do not think as they do regarding intimate relationships.
I've had the experience of attempting to inform women who are emotionally tied to these insensitive and inattentive men as to what motivates them.
"Young woman, all this guy wants from you is sex. He is not interested in you as a person nor does he care about you in any way, shape, or form. If it appears that he does care about you, it is only a temporary act to get you into the bed. The truth of the matter is that he will always revert to his true self after satisfying himself at your expense. Don't you get it?"
They usually answer, "Well, yes, I do get it but...."
What they really mean is, "No, I am clueless."
The pattern goes something like this...
Bad boys are interested in only one thing. The women who fall prey to these manipulative jerks are victims because they allow their love to overwhelm their better sense.
There is another factor to consider when analyzing what it is that causes good women to be attracted to bad boys.
These men also represent flirtations with danger or being able to venture into experiences they have never had before. Women who have lived straight lives, whether that be the result of being raised in a more conservative manner or having come out of a more sterile kind of marriage relationship, can be willing victims for these predators.
Like the proverbial fly who wants to get close enough to the fire and not be burned, bad boys serve as tour guides into the seemy side of life.
As a result, regardless of repetative breakups and reconsciliations, they have no idea that they have already flown too close to the fire and have been badly burned.
If you recognize yourself on this page, perhaps it is time to reach out and get some serious help before it is too late.
Women who allow themselves to fall victim to bad boys simply cannot accept that men do not think as they do regarding intimate relationships.
I've had the experience of attempting to inform women who are emotionally tied to these insensitive and inattentive men as to what motivates them.
"Young woman, all this guy wants from you is sex. He is not interested in you as a person nor does he care about you in any way, shape, or form. If it appears that he does care about you, it is only a temporary act to get you into the bed. The truth of the matter is that he will always revert to his true self after satisfying himself at your expense. Don't you get it?"
They usually answer, "Well, yes, I do get it but...."
What they really mean is, "No, I am clueless."
The pattern goes something like this...
- He is good to her
- He is attentive and demonstrates caring
- He is possibly even romantic
- He takes her to bed
- He takes a nap
- He becomes abusive: emotionally, verbally, physically
- He treats her badly
- He is inattentive and could care less about her
- He goes his own way and does what he wants to do, when he wants to do it, and who he wants to do it with
- He needs sex again
- He begins to be good to her again
- He is attentive and demonstrates caring
- He is possibly even romantic
- He takes her to bed
Bad boys are interested in only one thing. The women who fall prey to these manipulative jerks are victims because they allow their love to overwhelm their better sense.
There is another factor to consider when analyzing what it is that causes good women to be attracted to bad boys.
These men also represent flirtations with danger or being able to venture into experiences they have never had before. Women who have lived straight lives, whether that be the result of being raised in a more conservative manner or having come out of a more sterile kind of marriage relationship, can be willing victims for these predators.
Like the proverbial fly who wants to get close enough to the fire and not be burned, bad boys serve as tour guides into the seemy side of life.
As a result, regardless of repetative breakups and reconsciliations, they have no idea that they have already flown too close to the fire and have been badly burned.
If you recognize yourself on this page, perhaps it is time to reach out and get some serious help before it is too late.
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